Worrying about something +

 Worrying about something will make it turn

out better than if you didn’t worry.

This is so obviously ludicrous when it’s written

out, it’s laughable, but many of us still act as if

it were true. If your worrying points out a risk

that you can take action to mitigate, then go

for it, but worrying alone helps nothing. Yet we

often act like we’re falling down on the job if

we’re not worrying.

If you find it hard to quit cold turkey, this story

may help. A. J. Jacobs, editor-at-large at

Esquire magazine, did a life experiment where

he started outsourcing more and more tasks to

personal assistants in India. First he had his

assistants doing research and clerical tasks,

then he had them take over his

correspondence. He kept giving them more

assignments as he thought of things he didn’t

like doing. Finally, he realized he was spending

a lot of energy worrying about a big project he

was working on, and decided to try outsourcing

his worry. He didn’t outsource the project, just

worrying about it. He asked his assistant if she

would worry about it in his stead, and she

promised: “I will worry about this every day.

Do not worry.“ It worked: “Every time I started

to ruminate, I’d remind myself that [my

assistant] was already on the case, and I’d

relax.”

After I read this, I realized I was worrying

about a lot of things, and it wasn’t

accomplishing anything. I don’t have an

assistant in India, but A. J. does, and I figured

if she’s already worrying about his stuff, it’s not

much more trouble to worry about mine, too.

So I decided to pretend to outsource my

worrying to her. Every time I felt myself

beginning to worry or dwell on something

upsetting, I just told myself A. J.’s assistant

was on that and I could stop. Nothing came

out any worse for my not angsting over it, and

I felt a whole lot better. Over time, shortcircuiting

my worrying this way has become a

habit, and I worry much less.